New Republican Birth-control Method Revealed!

“Legitimate Rape” prevents most pregnancies.

Missouri Representative Todd Akin (R) today revealed the long-practiced but little discussed Republican birth-control method of forcible or “legitimate” rape.

“A woman’s baby-making parts just shut down during a rape,” explained Akin, “and so the rapist’s sperm can’t figure out where to go, or something like that, I guess.” When asked to explain how this new method could be effective when practiced in consensual or married sexual relationships, Akin smiled and said, “Trust me, anytime a Republican has sex with a woman it is legitimately a rape. If it wasn’t for forcible rape we’d never have sex at all!”  Akin added, “You see that ‘R’ following my name?  That ain’t for Republican!”


About Burl Ross

This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s